So fresh and so clean, clean

Hey friends! I have a quick lil’ post for you today. As you may have noticed I have yet again changed the look of the blog. It seems I am never satisfied and feel the need to perpetually strive for AESTHETIC PERFECTION.

At any rate, I’m digging the new, clean look. And what better to pair with a new clean blog than a recipe for you to get yourself a NEW CLEAN TOILET? Ok, maybe not new, but clean, ever so clean.

Unlike cleaning your tub, you don’t really have to get down and dirty with your toilet bowl in order to clean it properly (if you are, you are doing it wrong). However, a lot of products are marketed to make you feel like you have to exert little to no energy whatsoever in order to clean your toilet. But you know what, you should have to work a little. Not hard, but would like a few scrubs KILL YOU? No. It wouldn’t.

Of course with conventional toilet bowl cleaners you are looking at corrosive ingredients like chlorine bleach and hydrochloric acid, which can irritate your skin and eyes, and can be quite unpleasant/deadly if ingested. Aside from the conventional products there are a host of “eco-friendly” options that use plant and mineral based ingredients, are non-toxic, biodegradable, etc. I tend to be a little skeptical sometimes about a lot of these products, because there is an unhealthy amount of green-washing going around these days, and really, if you can make something that rivals, and/or out performs store-bought products, then why bother buying anything?

Here’s what you’ll need:

  • ½ cup baking soda
  • ¼ cup white vinegar
  • 10 drops of tea tree oil

Here’s what you’ll do:

  • Combine.
  • Pour.
  • Scrub.
  • Done.

This recipe is SO EASY and works SO WELL that I promise that you will never use anything ever again.

{these are a few of my favorite things}

{these are a few of my favorite things}

{toilet volcano}

{toilet volcano}

{yep folks, that's where the magic happens}

{yep folks, that’s where the magic happens}

{pristine porcelain}

{pristine porcelain}

 

 

 

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When Your Shower Becomes a Bath

I’ll admit to it, I can go quite a while in a semi-gross bathroom situation before doing anything about it. For some reason, I feel as though even though I may be standing in a filthy bathtub, as long as I’m getting clean it’s fine, right?  Well, apparently even I have a breaking point. The fact is, even if you clean your tub semi-regularly, if you don’t clean your drain then eventually the water will drain more slowly, thus making it easier for buildup and hair to stick to the sides of your tub once the water has eventually drained (like 30 minutes later). You may notice just a little standing water at first, and then before you know it’s halfway up your shins and you just feel like the grossest/laziest/most complacent person that ever was.

I will spare you the photos for this post, mostly because I am legitimately embarrassed that things got so bad, and also because it’s just gross and while an impressive before and after, it’s not worth the heartache of actually having to see how the sausage is made.

I started by cleaning the tub using a variation of the recipe from the Scrubbing Troubles post. Once the tub was clean I got to work on the drain. There are a few factors that make this drain particularly difficult. 1. It has an extremely shallow basin directly under the tub and then slopes under at this really unfortunate angle, meaning that everything sort of sits right under the drain, and slowly makes its way down into the abyss where it becomes impossible to snake out due to its angles. 2. The shower is shared by three humans and a dog with varying hair/fur length, so there is a lot of potential for clogged-ness.

I feel like an asshole for what I’m about to say, only because I feel like a broken record sometimes with these posts. HOWEVER, guess what unclogs drains? If you guessed baking soda and vinegar, you would be right. Ugh, I know guys, but really, it’s just magical.

Let’s examine the alternative though for a moment. There are three types of chemical drain cleaners:

  • Caustic Drain Cleaners: Work using lye and caustic potash. They essentially lend electrons to your clogs and the hydroxide ions in the chemicals create heat and turn clogs into a soap-like substance that becomes easier to dissolve. Probably mostly used for kitchen sink drains where your buildups are of the greasy variety.
  • Oxidizing Drain Cleaners: Contain chemicals such as bleach, peroxides and nitrates. The chemicals react with the organic materials in the clog, causing them to loose electrons and oxidize.
  • Acid Drain Cleaners: The heavy-duty shit, mostly only used by trained plumbing professionals. Contain high levels of sulfuric or hydrochloric acid. Hydronium ions react with the clog, and attract electrons which releases heat, which then like obliterates anything in it’s path.

So now let’s examine what that means for you and your pipes:

Since most of these products generate heat they may damage older, metal pipes. Which if you live in New York and are of limited means like we are, are the only kind of pipes you get. If you live in a more modern setup, you are likely to have PVC pipes, which the reaction from the chemicals can soften and damage over time.

If these products can like, MELT PLASTIC and shit it’s probably safe to assume they aren’t great for you or the Earth. See label. I’m sorry label; did you imply that you can cause EXPLOSIONS, and that you want me to wear an encapsulated chemical suit to clean my tub?

{um, no thanks}

{cool story, label}

No thanks. I’ll stick with the natural shit. Baking soda and vinegar create a chemical reaction when mixed together as well, by creating carbon dioxide bubbles as it fizzes up, it likely loosens up whatever is desperately clinging to your drains.

Now I didn’t simply pack my drain with baking soda and vinegar and expect it to evaporate all of the shit that is down there. There was quite a bit of hair that could be pulled up, and when I say quite a bit, what I mean is that I almost vomited in my mouth. What couldn’t be pulled out was likely loosened and flushed down with the baking soda and vinegar.

I used:

  • 1 Cup Baking Soda
  • ½ Cup White Vinegar

First I packed as much of the baking soda as I could into the drain, trying to leave room for the vinegar to escape through it a bit so that it moved down the drain and didn’t just sit there. I then poured the vinegar over the baking soda and immediately covered the drain. I left it to sit for about 30 minutes, flushed it out with hot water for two minutes. AND VOILA! Showers are showers again.

Cleaning your tub drain is not a pretty job, but somebody has got to do it. Hopefully you feel emboldened to tackle that drain naturally, whilst being confident that you will not melt your skin, clothes, and/or brain using volatile chemicals.

Vinegar, how I love thee.

We’ve said it before, and we will certainly say it many times again. We LOVE vinegar. Like for serious, love it. We have used it on our faces, hair, bathtubs, etc… Yesterday, I used it on my clothes, which were whimsically speckled with my own blood.

As the story goes, I went to get another hole poked into my nose, and basically ended up bleeding out a little bit all over my shirt and jeans. No big deal (and if you were wondering, yes, it looks rad). I was pretty breezy about being covered in my own blood, but you know, one tends to look a little crazy when walking around town like that. So I headed to a bar next door and asked the barkeep for two fingers of white vinegar and some napkins, he obliged despite being visibly confused/annoyed. I dabbed it onto the stains and they all but magically evaporated! Had I gotten to them sooner, I might have been able to eliminate them completely (there was only a slight faintness of them that I am sure would have come out with a bit more elbow grease/will definitely come out in the wash).

I did a bit more research and discovered that vinegar gets just about ANYTHING out. There are tons of homemade stain removers that you can explore here. However, I can be lazy and sometimes when I spill/hemmorage I just want to throw something on it immediately. For your convenience (and my amusement) I have made a handy little flow-chart for some common stains that you can use white vinegar on.

{I love flow charts ALMOST as much as I love vinegar}

{I love flow charts ALMOST as much as I love vinegar}

There will likely be more posts in the future about the perils of stains, but I just wanted to share this quick little one because I was so goddamned amazed (as always) by vinegar. Really, it’s just the best.

Scrubbing Troubles

Whilst on a recent trip to Philly I purchased a book of lovely herbal cleaning recipes entitled “The Naturally Clean Home”. This book is chock-full o’ super easy natural cleaning recipes and I highly recommend it to anyone who is interested in ditching the heavy stuff in lieu of more natural alternatives.

Today, I decided to tackle the dreaded bathtub. I have few enemies in this life; however, one of them, I have to admit is the bathtub. And I don’t just use it to shower; I bathe, regularly, so the fact that I don’t clean it very often is both embarrassing and gross. But here’s the thing: one cannot adequately clean one’s tub, without being in the tub. And furthermore, one cannot adequately clean one’s tub without water and some sort of cleaning agent. So where does this leave one? Mostly naked and marinating in a plume of toxic chemicals. Or maybe that’s just me.

Anyway, personally I don’t like soaking tits deep in a bucket of god knows what. Also, I have a dog, and while she is a sweet, supposedly smart Border collie, she is an idiot who likes to lick EVERYTHING. So that leaves having to close the bathroom door while cleaning the tub, also not ideal.

Enter: All Natural Tub and Tile Soft Scrubber.

Here’s What You’ll Need:

  • 1 cup Baking Soda
  • ¼ cup liquid castile soap (I used Dr. Bronner’s)
  • 2 vitamin C tablets, crushed
  • 3-5 drops eucalyptus essential oil
  • Water

Here’s What You’ll Do:

  1. Combine all ingredients in bowl except for water (if you were doubling or tripling the recipe I would say use a container that can be sealed and stored, since this recipe only made enough for one application I just used a plastic half pint container).
  2. Stir together and add just enough water until a paste forms.
  3. Apply paste to the gnarly areas of your bath and sink that you are embarrassed to look at and leave to sit for a few minutes.
  4. Take off clothes and climb on in.
  5. Scrub with sponge and rinse clean.

I always like to go into these recipes with a healthy dose of skepticism, but I was truly amazed by how well it worked. Not only is my tub BLINDINGLY white, but it also smells delightful.

{the fixings}

{the fixings}

{if you don't have a mortar and pestle just put into a plastic baggie and whack liberally with rolling pin}

{if you don’t have a mortar and pestle just put into a plastic baggie and whack liberally with rolling pin}

{bubbly cleaning paste of the Gods}

{bubbly cleaning paste of the Gods}

{the sink: before}

{the sink: before}

{the sink: After}

{the sink: after}

{the tub: before}

{the tub: before}

{the tub: after}

{the tub: after}

Please note: the the lighting in my bathroom is terrible. I wish that I could adequately show a before and after in a way that BLOWS YOUR MIND HOLE as much as mine was blown. In the meantime, you will just have to take my word for it and then go forth, and clean thy tub.

Happy scrubbing.